The Realm of the Verbal Processor

Jarvis's Ramblings

That Logic Doesn’t Work

On my flight to Bristol yesterday, I’m checking in at the airport. My bag is slightly overweight…52.5 pounds. I looked at the guy and asked if I could have a little grace or if I needed to take something out. He told me, “with the price of fuel, our managers are really cracking down, so you need to take some things out.”

I didn’t mind so I took 2.5 pounds out, and put them in my laptop bag. About that time it struck me…if fuel cost is the reasoning, what difference does it make if that 2.5 pounds is in my checked bag or my carryon?

I know that guy is just doing his job, and I didn’t say anything. But the logic that his manager is using is simply a bit faulty.

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March 14, 2008 Posted by | Misc | , , , , | Leave a comment

Chinese Restaurant

Last night I had Chinese take-out for supper. When I called to place the order, I had a menu in front of me, so I told them the number on the menu, in this case is was something like C13…combo meal 13. The lady sounded a little confused, so I said the number again. At that point she told me that their restaurant didn’t order by the number.

Hmmmm. A Chinese take-out restaurant that doesn’t order by the number? This may be completely groundless, but my trust factor for that restaurant immediately went down. But I went through with the order and requested the General Tso’s chicken meal.

My logic for why my trust factor went down may be flawed, but in this case it was accurate. The food simply was not as good as the “order by the number” Chinese restaurants that I’ve been to.

January 30, 2008 Posted by | comedy | , , | Leave a comment

One reason I hate election season

During any election season the number of phone calls in America goes through the roof. Doesn’t matter if you are on the National Do Not Call list…political calls are exempt. During election season we screen every phone call that comes in. If you don’t talk to the answering machine and sound like someone I know…it doesn’t get answered.

Tonight we had let multiple phone calls go unanswered. A few minutes ago my oldest daughter (who didn’t know why we weren’t answering the phone) answered a phone call. She brought it over to me. I got on and the guy started going into his spiel about wanting to ask questions of voters about certain candidates and issues. I very politely said, “No thank you.”

At that point the guy is reaching for the button on his phone to hang up and mumbles the word “a##hole” under his breath before he actually hit the button. Not only are you one of the people disturbing the peace of my home, but you insult me before hanging up. Now I could have hung up on the guy in mid-sentence, but no…I was polite enough to wait until he got to a pausing point and politely tell him no. There is a reason I don’t answer the phone…being polite apparently doesn’t pay. I will still continue to be nice if one of them gets through the screening process again, but this type of thing is why I despise election season.

I really wish I had listened closer to which group he was with. It was something that sounded like “Public Insights”.

January 24, 2008 Posted by | life | | Leave a comment

Now THAT’s a Christmas Tree!

Here is a pic I snapped of Julie standing next to the Christmas tree in her parents’ house. She is 4′ 11″. The tree is approximately 17 feet tall. The guys at the tree farm they got it said it was the biggest tree on the farm. BTW…I did no trick photography to make the tree look bigger. I held the camera level at standing height…what you see is an accurate representation.

Christmas Tree

December 29, 2007 Posted by | Misc | , , | 1 Comment

Fake cashiers check scam

I’m currently trying to sell our minivan on cars.com. On Saturday, I got a phone call from a potential buyer. It was a phone call through one of the services for the deaf…so I’m talking to an operator who is reading to me what the other person is typing and then typing what I say in response. The caller made an offer that sounded good, then e-mailed me with details for closing the sale. However through the entire call, I just had feeling that this was a scam. Why would a person in Wisconsin want to buy an eight year old van in Florida that is listed as “fair” condition? That just doesn’t make sense.

As soon as I got the email, I knew that I was right. It was a fake cashiers check scam. Basic gist was that he was “offering” to send me a cashiers check for more than the purchase amount and have me wire the balance to him. Sorry dude…I may have been born at night…but it wasn’t last night. What made it even funnier was the name that the scammer used. Shawn Combs. Dude! P Diddy wants to buy my eight year old minivan! Yeah…right.

So…my first inclination is to send back a nasty email. Then I thought for a second. Naw…I don’t want to send an e-mail that he will just delete. If possible, I want to screw his world. I called the Secret Service instead. Continue reading

December 17, 2007 Posted by | Misc | , , , , | 1 Comment

Shoes from Auschwitz

Just saw this page. It’s a picture that represents a day’s worth of shoes collected during the gassing of the Jewish people at Auschwitz…25,000 pairs of shoes.

I started to get physically sick looking at the picture…realizing that each of the people wearing them were murdered. In particular note the two whitish colored shoes toward the top right…the matching pair. It’s one thing to read about the atrocities of the holocaust. That photo brings it home.

December 5, 2007 Posted by | life | , | Leave a comment

Locked Antlers

I was having a hunting conversation with a co-worker and was showing him the pictures below. My dad found these when I was about three years old. These two very mature bucks had been fighting and got their antlers locked together, and because they couldn’t get their antlers separated, they ended up dying or killing each other. They were found on private property in Mississippi back in November 1974. Somewhere out there is a picture of a very small verbal processor sitting in the center of the antlers.

Just a note: the antlers were locked together hard. Before they were mounted, my dad and someone else tried unsuccessfully to pull them apart. Another note is that both of these deer were large enough to make the Boone and Crockett record book. Clicking on either picture will take you to the higher res version on my Flickr site.

Locked Antlers  Locked Antlers

November 6, 2007 Posted by | Misc | | 2 Comments